How Internal Family Systems (IFS) Can Help Treat Your Complex Trauma (C-PTSD): Advice From a Trauma Therapist
So you've come to the realization that you're dealing with Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD), and now you're deciding what to do next. First, let’s ensure you’re in the right place. Trauma therapy, in addition to IFS (Internal Family Systems), can offer powerful support and healing, helping you navigate the complexities of CPTSD and work towards a more balanced and peaceful life.
Symptoms of CPTSD
The symptoms of Complex PTSD include the following. If these match your experience, read on.
Intrusive reminders of the trauma: This might include recurrent and distressing thoughts, nightmares, flashbacks, or intense physical and emotional reactions to triggers.
Avoidance: People with CPTSD often go to great lengths to avoid anything that reminds them of the traumatic event, including people, places, situations, or even thoughts and feelings.
Negative changes in thinking and mood: CPTSD can lead to persistent negative beliefs about oneself or the world, self-blame, ongoing sadness or hopelessness, emotional numbness, difficulty experiencing positive emotions, and feelings of detachment or disconnection.
Changes in arousal and reactivity: These might include irritability or anger, reckless or self-destructive behavior, hypervigilance, difficulty concentrating, being easily startled, and sleep problems.
More severe symptoms: In some cases, CPTSD can also involve a deeply negative self-view, dissociation (feeling disconnected from oneself or one's surroundings), overwhelming emotions, significant relationship difficulties, a loss of faith or belief systems, and a distorted sense of reality.
When identifying these symptoms, it’s important to be compassionate with yourself and remember that many of the symptoms of CPTSD likely developed as coping mechanisms to navigate the difficult trauma you experienced. For example maybe you…
Learned to suppress emotions to maintain a facade of being "the perfect child” but then you blow up later for “little to no reason”.
Or maybe you maintain fierce independence to avoid vulnerability and prevent others from getting close, due to being hurt by people close to you.
Assume the symptoms listed above match, your next decision point is deciding if you want and need help.
The Choice Point: Do You Want Help?
Ask yourself: do you want your life to improve? Are the symptoms of CPTSD causing enough disruption in your life that you're ready to seek treatment?
If the challenges in your life are things you’d like to change, and if you're ready to invest the time and energy required for trauma healing, there are several effective treatment options available.
Treatment Options
Internal Family Systems (IFS)
This blog will focus on how Internal Family Systems (IFS) can support your healing journey.
What is Internal Family Systems?
It’s important to know that IFS is a type of individual therapy your therapist can provide if they’ve had the training. It is not family therapy. IFS is a therapeutic approach built on the idea that we all possess various parts within our personalities. This isn't about having a split personality disorder; it's more like the movie Inside Out, where the main character, Riley, has different parts inside her that influence her decisions.
While Inside Out portrays parts specifically as emotions (anger, sadness, joy, disgust), IFS views parts as having distinct functions. Parts can have a variety of roles including pleasing people, managing emotions, dealing with vulnerability, managing how close to let someone, etc. For example, imagine if Riley had a "core memory" of being repeatedly invalidated by her parents, she’d likely have a part of her that worked to keep her from opening up further to her parents and maybe even friends. IFS aims to address these core memories and connected parts to help people heal.
Three Types of Parts
In IFS, there are 3 common types of parts we have in our personalities.
Wounds: Complex trauma creates wounded parts within us. Carrying feelings of unworthiness, lack of love, or other deep-seated pain.
Managers: These parts manage our daily lives, often working to protect or hide our wounds.
Firefighters: When a wound is triggered, firefighters step in to try to soothe pain and work in overdrive to protect the wounded parts. This often plays out in unhealthy behaviors such as substance abuse, overeating, or excessive spending.
How Does IFS Help?
It’s easier to illustrate this through examples. Let’s look at two, one person who struggles with perfectionism, and other person who struggles with keeping people at a distance. I’ll use the words “wounded part,” “manager,” and “firefighters,” so reference the parts above if needed.
Example 1: Perfectionism
Let’s imagine a woman who struggles with perfectionism in school. She experiences anxiety and worries about achieving perfect grades and maintaining an image of having it all together.
“Deeper down, IFS recognizes there’s a core wound. ”
IFS would view the parts striving for perfection as managers. But when she makes a mistake, and the perfectionism manager fails, her “firefighter” part would activate and put her into overdrive making her anxious and highly defensive. This is all to protect her from getting her wounded part triggered.
Deeper down, IFS recognizes there’s a core wound. Perhaps she only felt loved and accepted by her mother when she was doing the right thing, leaving her with a wound of pain and sadness from the conditional love.
IFS would work to heal this wound, the sadness and pain, helping her realize that she is worthy of love regardless of her achievements. As her wounded part heals, the parts driving her perfectionism would let go of their roles. They’d no longer need to constantly work at being perfect, and she’d be able to accept mistakes and offer herself love and kindness, no matter what.
Example 2: Invalidation
Let’s imagine a man who struggles to open up to others, despite longing for connection and feeling lonely.
IFS would suggest that a "manager" part is at play, keeping people at a distance to protect a deeper wound. A "firefighter" part might shut him down completely if he starts getting too close to people or if people start prying to learn more about him.
IFS recognizes that these parts act to protect a deeper wound. Perhaps he was consistently invalidated and dismissed by his father as a child, creating a wound that makes opening up feel dangerous.
A trauma therapist specialized in IFS would work to heal this wound, helping him realize that not everyone will invalidate him. With healing, he would feel more comfortable opening up, experiencing deeper connections, and learning who he can safely trust with his vulnerability.
How Are Wounds Healed?
The healing process varies depending on the wound. It often involves being present with and holding the parts experiencing pain. Offering them the love and acceptance they need. Each wounded part has unique needs. But compassion, kindness, love, and acceptance are often key components of healing.
You don't need to worry about knowing what your parts need; they know themselves. When you're present with them, they will guide the healing process.
Is IFS Right for Me?
If reading this resonates with you, and you're interested in exploring your parts, IFS might be a good fit. Click the button below to schedule a free consultation with an IFS-informed therapist today.
If IFS doesn't feel right, remember that many trauma recovery therapists are trained in multiple modalities. Talk to your therapist, or if you’re looking for one, you can request a free consultation with Shade Tree Family Counseling to see what other trauma modalities are offered to treat complex trauma.
Begin Healing From Your Complex Trauma With Trauma Therapy in Salt Lake City, UT
If you struggle with Complex PTSD (C-PTSD), begin coping with the help of trauma therapy in Salt Lake City, UT. A skilled trauma therapist who specializes in IFS at Shade Tree Family Counseling can help you start healing from your trauma. Find support by following these three simple steps:
Schedule a free 15-minute consultation to determine if trauma therapy with IFS is the right for you.
Meet with a skilled trauma therapist.
Begin healing from your complex PTSD.
Additional Services Offered at Shade Tree Family Counseling
At Shade Tree Family Counseling, we want to provide support for the whole family. So in addition to helping you work on healing from complex trauma in Trauma Therapy, our team offers teen counseling for teens struggling to overcome depression, anxiety, family conflict, and more. We also provide Family Therapy for families looking for extra support in navigating conflict. For more about trauma therapy check out our other blogs!
